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Anger and alcohol seem to go hand-in-hand, don’t they? Chances are, you’ve either seen this in your friends or you’ve seen it in yourself. Do you ever wonder why it feels so easy to confront your anger when you’re drinking? It isn’t just anger, either. You’ve probably noticed (or observed) that you say and do things when you’re drinking that you wouldn’t normally say or do.
You hear about it all the time, too. Just last year, a Texas wife submitted a letter to the “Dear Abby” column. It read:
“Dear Abby,
Sometimes when my husband, Tom, drinks he becomes volatile. A month ago, after being out drinking, he came home very late. I made a joke that upset him and he started yelling and calling me names. I have learned that when Tom gets like that, it’s best to just agree with him.
On that occasion, it didn’t work, and he began breaking things. Our teenage son Eric was so scared he called the police. When the police arrived they told my husband who had placed the call and interviewed each of us separately. After they left, Tom called Eric ugly names, told him he was done with him and hasn’t spoken to him since. If they are in the same room, my husband won’t look at him or talk to him.”
Suffice it to say, Abby told the stressed mother and wife that her husband needed to address his drinking before he could address the anger… but why? What do drinking and anger have to do with one another? Why are some people angry when they’re drunk and others seem carefree or relaxed?
There’s a reason for this, and it’s not as simple as “alcohol makes you mad.” At Serenity Lane, we care deeply about everyone in our Oregon communities, and we don’t want to see them controlled by alcohol or anger. Let’s talk more about the link between the two.
Alcohol use disorder (AUD) doesn’t happen overnight. Often, it takes months (or even years) before someone finds themselves physiologically and psychologically dependent on alcohol. In other words, it’s a long and arduous journey for many. Because of this, it’s not always easy to figure out whether or not someone you love has a “problem,” let alone exactly when it began. Additionally, it can be hard for people to spot the signs of AUD in themselves.
How can you tell when your relationship with alcohol has become unhealthy?
Here are some signs commonly associated with AUD:
When most people think of how alcohol affects the body, the brain isn’t the first thing that comes to mind. We often think of the liver, stomach, and how alcohol damages our overall physical health. But the brain is deeply (and immediately) impacted by heavy alcohol use as well. In fact, it’s the relationship alcohol shares with the brain that often causes people to experience things like rage and irritability while drinking.
Have you ever heard of the limbic system? It’s a very important area of the brain directly impacted by alcohol use. The limbic system is responsible for our reactions to perceived threats. An example would be if you were to get cut off by another driver on a busy or chaotic highway. Your heart may start to race, your palms might get sweaty, and you may feel like your entire body is “on alert” for the next 15 minutes. This is because your body is preparing to protect itself. This is also known as the fight or flight response.
Neurotransmitters like serotonin play a large role in the limbic response. A healthy amount of serotonin means our reactions to perceived threats will likely be logical – like our tension when a car cuts us off on the freeway. When there isn’t enough serotonin, the limbic system begins to perceive threats where there may not be any. And because alcohol directly impacts serotonin levels, excess drinking means our limbic response isn’t reliable. This is one reason why people are quick to anger when they’re drinking – they are perceiving more threats than they would with no alcohol in their system.
Many have unresolved feelings of anger, frustration, or rage before they reach for alcohol. Additionally, it’s common for people to self-medicate with alcohol, thinking that drinking will numb those feelings or allow them to forget – if only for one evening. In reality, alcohol is doing the opposite. The mood someone is in when they begin drinking is often the mood that will be intensely felt once they’ve reached a level of intoxication. That, paired with the way people make decisions when they’re drinking, is often a recipe for disaster.
The stress-reducing effects of alcohol often make people believe there are no real consequences for their actions, which leads to confrontations, fights, or displays of aggression. This is called alcohol myopia, and it’s another reason why people are quick to anger when they drink. In other words, whatever you’re feeling before you drink will likely be magnified once you’re drunk, and because your decision-making is impaired, you’re more likely to act out that anger.
Over time, this becomes an unhealthy cycle. It’s easy to disregard tough emotions in the moment if you know you can “take the edge off” once you have a drink in your hand. It may feel like you’re confronting that anger once intoxicated, but because alcohol also impairs memory, you’re never fully able to process that anger.
A 2013 study published in the National Library of Medicine found that alcohol has both acute and chronic adverse effects on learning-related plasticity across brain regions, which contributes to cognitive dysfunction and even disability. In other words, long-term anger management is borderline impossible when someone is drinking regularly or in excess. Healing can’t happen when alcohol is involved, so the anger continues.
Despite what you may have heard, anger is not an unhealthy emotion. It only becomes unhealthy when it goes unresolved and when it isn’t addressed. Managing an alcohol use disorder (AUD) is hard enough. When you add unresolved anger it can be downright overwhelming. While anger isn’t necessarily a side effect of alcoholism, drinking to “dull” or “numb” the anger (or other emotions) isn’t just ineffective – it could be a sign that it’s time to seek help for some deeper issues.
Learning the root causes of your AUD and identifying the triggers for your anger is a healthy and necessary process. It’s when you can identify what’s wrong that you can begin to heal from it. Once alcohol consumption is under control, anger management can begin. It doesn’t matter how much anger you have – ignoring it doesn’t do any good. The fact is that both AUD and anger don’t need to be permanent, especially with quality treatment.
Finding wellness through treatment at Serenity Lane doesn’t just mean finding recovery from AUD. It means identifying your triggers for anger and finding out why you’re self-medicating with alcohol. It means learning how to approach your anger in a way that serves you and your recovery. Oftentimes, when talking about anger management, healing is also about setting boundaries and learning self-compassion.
The master’s level clinicians and therapists at Serenity Lane dedicate their lives to offering evidence-based, compassionate, and comprehensive addiction treatment because we know anyone can recover. We don’t want you to face uncontrolled anger or alcohol use disorder alone – we want to help.
There are a variety of options available to you. One of the most common misconceptions about seeking treatment for anger issues or alcohol use is that you’ll need to leave your family, your work, or your friends. If that’s something you feel you’re unable to do, we can support you with other methods of treatment. We also offer residential treatment for those needing intensive care. Each client is unique, so each treatment plan is unique.
We are proud to offer a full continuum of care for alcohol use disorder:
Serenity Lane is the oldest non-profit program in the state of Oregon with over 50 years of experience. We specialize in individualized, effective, and innovative solutions for recovery. If you or someone you love is ready for alcohol addiction treatment, call us today at 800-543-9905. We offer no-cost, confidential screenings at all of our locations.
Why Am I an Angry Drunk?
It’s possible that you were angry before you started drinking and alcohol is magnifying those feelings. It is also possible that excessive alcohol consumption is causing a depletion of the neurotransmitter serotonin, which plays a role in mood regulation.
Why Does Alcohol Cause Anger?
The stress-reducing effects of alcohol often make people believe there are no real consequences for their actions, which leads to confrontations, fights, or displays of aggression.
Is an angry drunk showing signs of mental health disorder?
Not necessarily. Someone who is frequently angry while drunk could have an underlying mental health condition, but it could also just be the consequence of long-term or unresolved anger.
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